Sometimes when you are growing something- a brand, a child, a plant, etc- you feel the need to go out and spend money on new equipment, technologies, books, supplies etc. This is especially true for myself. I am a rising photographer in a saturated market of artists and wanna be’s. The pressure has always been high to have the most expensive gear and software so it could validate me and my business. You can find a photographer on every corner, with better gear and better promises of making you look and feel like a star and it seems like I’m just a spec of dust.
I’ve been around long enough to know that real photography is not about equipment. I also know that your business is not going to grow because you have the full Adobe suite. Be that as is may, I still struggle thinking that I would be further along if I had more “stuff”. This insecurity of mine (and many others) haunts me daily and I don’t know if it’ll ever go away.
I decided (and between you and I, I keep landing at this decision over and over again) to focus on perfecting my skills on the equipment and softwear I DO have and to stretch my creativity. God (the Creator) had blessed me with a mind, gifts, and creativity that I’ve spent the last few years in a dormant state. So this whole experience has been exercising my mind and my grit! It’s pushing me to not accept my current situation, to always push the envelope, to accept that fear is a natural feeling of the unknown but I can’t let it paralyze me, to replace the concept of failure from my mental matter with the concept of tenancity, and to sharpen my focus constantly.
So in conclusion, I may always have this insecurity and I may never have the best equipment. But another thing I will ALWAYS have, is my grit, my gifts, faith in myself and confidence in my heavenly Father! So keep working to grow your business, your plant, your craft, etc. And know that there are GOING to growing pains. But the race is not given to the strongest or the fastest; but to the one that endures.
Below are some RAW shots I took around my apartment with my Nikon D5100 and my 35mm 1.8 lens